Desperate Households
Jay Sloan
10/28/07

1. Abraham and Sarah- Understanding our wives weakness.
Wives like compliments but need commitment
Genesis 11-13 “And it came to pass, when he was come near to enter into Egypt, that he said unto Sarai his wife, Behold now,
I know that thou art a fair woman to look upon: 12 Therefore it shall come to pass, when the Egyptians shall see thee, that they
shall say, This is his wife: and they will kill me, but they will save thee alive. 13 Say, I pray thee, thou art my sister: that it may
be well with me for thy sake; and my soul shall live because of thee.”
*Proverbs 5:18 “Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth”.
*Ecclesiastes 9:9 “Live joyfully with the wife whom thou lovest all the days of the life…”
Wives will sacrifice the physical for emotional security
Genesis 16:1,2 “Now Sarai Abram’s wife bare him no children: and she had an handmaid, an Egyptian, whose name was Hagar. 2 And Sarai said unto Abram, Behold now, the
LORD hath restrained me from bearing: I pray thee, go in unto my maid; it may be that I may obtain children by her. And Abram hearkened to the voice of Sarai.”
*1 Peter 3:7 “Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto
the weaker vessel,…”
Wives want a man who will love them sacrificially (They want a hero)
Genesis 20:2;8-11 “And Abraham said of Sarah his wife, She is my sister: and Abimelech king of Gerar sent, and took Sarah. 8 Therefore Abimelech rose early in the morning,
and called all his servants, and told all these things in their ears: and the men were sore afraid. 9 Then Abimelech called Abraham, and said unto him, What hast thou done unto
us? and what have I offended thee, that thou hast brought on me and on my kingdom a great sin? thou hast done deeds unto me that ought not to be done. 10 And Abimelech said
unto Abraham, What sawest thou, that thou hast done this thing? 11 And Abraham said, Because I thought, Surely the fear of God is not in this place; and they will slay me for
my wife’s sake.”
*Ephesians 5:25 “Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it”;
*Ephesians 5:28 “So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.”
*Ephesians 5:33 “Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself;…”
2. Isaac and Rebekah- Understanding the power of prayer.
The wife was chosen by prayer (What are your standards)
Genesis 24:12-15 “And he said, O LORD God of my master Abraham, I pray thee, send me good speed this day, and shew kindness unto my master Abraham. 13 Behold, I stand
here by the well of water; and the daughters of the men of the city come out to draw water: 14 And let it come to pass, that the damsel to whom I shall say, Let down thy pitcher, I
pray thee, that I may drink; and she shall say, Drink, and I will give thy camels drink also: let the same be she that thou hast appointed for thy servant Isaac; and thereby shall I
know that thou hast shewed kindness unto my master. 15 And it came to pass, before he had done speaking, that, behold, Rebekah came out,…”
Matthew 26:41 “Watch and pray,…”
The husband was a man of prayer (private and personal)
Genesis 24:63 “And Isaac went out to meditate in the field at the eventide: and he lifted up his eyes, and saw, and, behold, the camels were coming.”
*Matthew 6:6 “But thou, when thou prayest, enter into thy closet, and when thou hast shut thy door, pray to thy Father
which is in secret; and thy Father which seeth in secret shall reward thee openly.”
The family was coupled in prayer
Genesis 25:21,22 “And Isaac intreated the LORD for his wife, because she was barren: and the LORD was intreated of him, and Rebekah his wife conceived.22 And the children
struggled together within her; and she said, If it be so, why am I thus? And she went to enquire of the LORD.”
*1 Peter 3:7 “…being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.”
*1 Corinthians 7:5 “ … that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer;…”
3. Jacob and Leah and Rachel- Understanding the importance of intimacy.
Genesis 29:17 “Leah was tender eyed; but Rachel was beautiful and well favoured.”
The marriage was based on the infatuation and deceit. (Intimacy is used for pleasure)
Genesis 29:18-25 “And Jacob loved Rachel; and said, I will serve thee seven years for Rachel thy younger daughter. 20 And Jacob served seven years for Rachel; and they seemed
unto him but a few days, for the love he had to her. 21 And Jacob said unto Laban, Give me my wife, for my days are fulfilled, that I may go in unto her. 23 And it came to pass
in the evening, that he took Leah his daughter, and brought her to him; and he went in unto her. 25 And it came to pass, that in the morning, behold, it was Leah: and he said to
Laban, What is this thou hast done unto me? did not I serve with thee for Rachel? wherefore then hast thou beguiled me?"
The husband is married to two women. The one she is, and the one she wish she could be.
(Intimacy is used for acceptance)
Genesis 28:30 “And he went in also unto Rachel, and he loved also Rachel more than Leah, and served with him yet seven other years.”
31 “And when the LORD saw that Leah was hated, he opened her womb: but Rachel was barren.”
32 “ …now therefore my husband will love me.”
33 “ …Because the LORD hath heard that I was hated,…”
34 “ …Now this time will my husband be joined unto me, …”
30:20 “…now will my husband dwell with me,…”
*Hebrews 13:4 “Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled:…”
The wife is always in fear of losing her husband. (Intimacy is used for security)
Genesis 30:14-16 “And Reuben went in the days of wheat harvest, and found mandrakes in the field, and brought them unto his mother Leah. Then Rachel said to Leah, Give me, I
pray thee, of thy son’s mandrakes.15 And she said unto her, Is it a small matter that thou hast taken my husband? and wouldest thou take away my son’s mandrakes also? And
Rachel said, Therefore he shall lie with thee to night for thy son’s mandrakes.16 And Jacob came out of the field in the evening, and Leah went out to meet him, and said, Thou
must come in unto me; for surely I have hired thee with my son’s mandrakes. And he lay with her that night.”
*I Corinthians 7:3-5 “Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the
husband. 4 The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power
of his own body, but the wife. 5 Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give
yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency”
4. Lot and family- Understanding the danger of worldliness.
*James 1:14a “But every man is tempted…”,
Genesis 18:10 “And Lot lifted up his eyes, and beheld all the plain of Jordan, that it was well watered every where, before the LORD destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah, even as the
garden of the LORD, …”
*James 1:14b “…when he is drawn away of his own lust,”
11 “Then Lot chose him all the plain of Jordan; and Lot journeyed east: and they separated themselves the one from the other.”
*James 1:14c “…and enticed.”
12 “…and Lot dwelled in the cities of the plain, and pitched his tent toward Sodom.”
13 But the men of Sodom were wicked and sinners before the LORD exceedingly.
*James 1:15a “ Then when lust hath conceived, it bringeth forth sin…”:
Genesis 19:1 “And there came two angels to Sodom at even; and Lot sat in the gate of Sodom: and Lot seeing them rose up to meet them; and he bowed himself with his face
toward the ground;”
*James 1:15b “…and sin, when it is finished, bringeth forth death”.
Genesis 19:13 “For we will destroy this place, because the cry of them is waxen great before the face of the LORD; and the LORD hath sent us to destroy it.”
The Danger of perverted passion
Genesis 19:4-11 “But before they lay down, the men of the city, even the men of Sodom, compassed the house round, both old and young, all the people from every quarter: 5 And
they called unto Lot, and said unto him, Where are the men which came in to thee this night? bring them out unto us, that we may know them. (sexually) 6 And Lot went out at
the door unto them, and shut the door after him, 7 And said, I pray you, brethren, do not so wickedly. 9 And they said, Stand back. And they said again, This one fellow came in
to sojourn, and he will needs be a judge: now will we deal worse with thee, than with them. And they pressed sore upon the man, even Lot, and came near to break the door. 10
But the men put forth their hand, and pulled Lot into the house to them, and shut the door. 11 And they smote the men that were at the door of the house with blindness, both small
and great: so that they wearied themselves to find the door.”
*2 Peter 2:7,8 “And delivered just Lot, vexed with the filthy conversation of the wicked: 8 (For that righteous man
dwelling among them, in seeing and hearing, vexed his righteous soul from day to day with their unlawful deeds;)”
The Danger of perverted parenting
Genesis 19:8 “Behold now, I have two daughters which have not known man; let me, I pray you, bring them out unto you, and do ye to them as is good in your eyes: only unto
these men do nothing; for therefore came they under the shadow of my roof.”
The Danger of perverted perspective
Genesis 19:12-17;26 “And the men said unto Lot, Hast thou here any besides? son in law, and thy sons, and thy daughters, and whatsoever thou hast in the city, bring them out of
this place: 14 And Lot went out, and spake unto his sons in law, which married his daughters, and said, Up, get you out of this place; for the LORD will destroy this city. But he
seemed as one that mocked unto his sons in law. 15 ¶ And when the morning arose, then the angels hastened Lot, saying, Arise, take thy wife, and thy two daughters, which are here; lest
thou be consumed in the iniquity of the city. 16 And while he lingered, the men laid hold upon his hand, and upon the hand of his wife, and upon the hand of his two daughters; the
LORD being merciful unto him: and they brought him forth, and set him without the city. 17 And it came to pass, when they had brought them forth abroad, that he said, Escape
for thy life; look not behind thee, neither stay thou in all the plain; escape to the mountain, lest thou be consumed. 26 But his wife looked back from behind him, and she became a
pillar of salt.”
*Luke 17:32 Remember Lot’s wife.
*33 Whosoever shall seek to save his life shall lose it; and whosoever shall lose his life shall preserve it.
The Danger of perverted persuasion
Genesis 19:31,32;36 “And the firstborn said unto the younger, Our father is old, and there is not a man in the earth to come in unto us after the manner of all the earth: 32 Come,
let us make our father drink wine, and we will lie with him, that we may preserve seed of our father. 36 Thus were both the daughters of Lot with child by their father.”